The winter breeze pierces through me, like a veteran tatoo artist to a rebellious 13 year old. A 13 year old with the world in front of him. And a shiny new gold ring around the ear. That ring is the world. The world seems golden. But eventually fades, and turns your hopes green. The repugdant grind of life turns said optimistic teen into a beaten 26 year old. Yes, repugdant is a word. It’s a mix between redundant and repugnant. So shut the fuck up. Quote the Raven, nevermore.
Somethings gotta give. I feel that most of the times with me, I can go real long spells of laziness. I eat like shit, I get depressed, then I try to pick myself back up. Usually fail, rinse and repeat. I’m trying to back on a diet tomorrow, “lifestyle change”, whatever you want to call it. I feel that if I can limit the shitty food that I eat, and combine it with exercise, I eventually will get to a less disgusting physique. Somethings gotta give though, I hate the face I see in the mirror (and by mirror, I mean facebook tags). I also know I’m not getting any younger, and being blessed with great health while being obese is like wearing white robes in Harlem. Sooner or later, my lucks gonna run out.
I’m also looking into a second job, trying to pick myself up out of this financial shitstorm that I’m facing. I am setting up an interview with a guy sometime this week selling sausage. Yes, I’m serious. No punchline needed. I really hope I get it, it’s too much comedy gold. Even if it doesn’t pan out, I need a second job. Somethings gotta give.
I think this midsummer heats getting to my head or something. As of late, I’ve really been thinking about how much I miss my youth. Also the innocence of youth. How awesome it was to be 12 years old in the summer? The only cares in the world was if you were going to get a hit in wiffle ball, and hoping the ice cream man was going to stop by your street. It’s sad.
I think I have a Peter Pan complex. Don’t worry, I’m not going to buy monkeys or start touching boys or anything, but it bothers me. I feel life is set up poorly. You start your education at a young age, and you learn when you’re too naive to understand its significance. And, if you are unfortunate enough, when you’re older, and ready to learn, you can’t afford it. Because you’re smothered in debt, and responsibility. I suggest we put 12 year olds to work. 20 percent of their earnings automatically go into a savings account, so that they have money later on. When you turn 25. Boom. Money to hang out and play. Ok, that idea is illogical and borderline idiotic. But, hey. Somethings gotta give.